Hello @Ashra Koehn & forum family,
I've been doing my best to always be positive with my situation. I know that my ex fiance has been distant and I'm just trying to be as patient as I possibly could. We were together for almost 13 years. We have a 12 year old son together. I'm doing everything I possibly can to stay connected with her and I'm learning a great deal of patience. I've never been the patient type.
My son and I have been going to church for the past maybe 3 to 4 months. My son is enjoying it and I'm also learning to leave everything up to our father in Heaven. I've had ashra do alot of work and I'm also very thankful for everything her and her mentor have done for me. I'm not very good at the no spying but doing my best to be better. Just very afraid of her new friends.. they are not looking at her best interests and are very bad influences.
I try very hard not to contact her. But she came by yesterday with her brother to get a package that was delivered here to my house. I haven't seen her or talked to her really in what feels like months. But she got out and gave me a hug and asked me how my Men's Retreat was for church I said it was good. Before she left she got out and gave me a hug again and I know she didn't have too but we hugged for about a good minute. I did not want to let her go, but it felt like a genuine hug and I missed it. I've missed her so much. I just wish or hope she enjoyed it as much as I did. She looked so beautiful.
But I'm very hopeful about this culminating moon rise ritual. I really hope everything works perfectly and that she starts to see me for me again and want to reconnect and make things work. I hope the hug was a good sign and that she can reflect on it as well. I've been seeing alot of the cars I bought her just not too much with signs. She doesn't really text or call but I'm hoping that changes.. Trying to be positive.
I feel bad for missing out on the complete moon spell, but I'm glad I realized I should act as if my lover's breakup with his girlfriend has already happened. I had a feeling since he texted me last week that she would disagree with the idea of his kids living with him. This morning, I even visualized myself waking up in his bed and realizing I needed to get to my job.